Note: CONTENT WARNING - this post covers discussion of sexual assault. Reader caution is recommended. Seek competent help - including professional - if you need it. For anyone distressed by anything in this post, or for any other reason considering seeking support, resources are available in Australia here, here, and here. In other nations, you will have to do an Internet search using terms such as “mental health support - <your nation>” (which, for instance, may lead to this, this, and this, in the USA, or this, this, and this, in France [biased towards English-language - my apologies]).
Sexual assault is a crime that can be inflicted in many ways and potentially by many people - including:
- cisgender men against cisgender women (the most prevalent - see here);
- cisgender men against others - girls, boys, TGD people, and others (reading the Crimes Act section on this lists some sickening, truly disturbing possibilities);
- cisgender women against cisgender men - as this is too often ignored or treated with derision (which undoubtedly reduces the report rate), I’ve provided some links below on this problem, and also cisgender women against others (girls, boys, TGD people, and others);
- TGD people against cisgender and TGD people; and
- children against other children.
Sexuality is not an issue - especially in the case of child abuse, but LGB people are capable of committing sexual assault as well as heterosexual people.
Victims of sexual assault need support - and legal systems in most parts of the world need to stop double assaulting victims. "Myths" (lies of convenience to belief systems) need to be rebutted, and other (in addition to the "myths") factors contributing to sexual assault need to be dealt with - factors such as endemic patriarchal social engineering, disparity in power, inadequacies of character leading to violent reactions to actual or perceived loss of power/status, incompetence with emotions / relationships / being human, etc, etc, etc.
All religious / spiritual paths have a particular obligation in terms of preventing sexual assault and dealing with the aftermath - especially as so many religious or other paths have been the scenes of such crimes - sometimes in ways and to extents that are truly horrendous.
Some general links are:
- https://www.vic.gov.au/what-sexual-assault;
- https://www.vic.gov.au/family-violence-reform-rolling-action-plan-2020-2023/sexual-assault-and-family-violence;
- https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/sexual-assault-and-rape;
- https://www.dss.gov.au/women/publications-articles/reducing-violence/sexual-assault;
- https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Sexual_assault&oldid=1137055244;
- https://www.britannica.com/topic/sexual-abuse;
- https://www.britannica.com/topic/sexual-harassment;
- https://www.britannica.com/topic/rape-crime;
- https://www.britannica.com/topic/honor-killing - which is a gross and grossly offensive misnomer that all publications should lay off;
and - https://www.encyclopedia.com/social-sciences/encyclopedias-almanacs-transcripts-and-maps/sexual-abuse;
- https://www.legalaid.vic.gov.au/sexual-assault;
- https://www.legalaid.vic.gov.au/sex-and-law;
- https://www.justice.vic.gov.au/victorias-new-sexual-offence-laws-an-introduction;
- https://www.police.vic.gov.au/sexual-offences;
- https://content.legislation.vic.gov.au/sites/default/files/2022-12/58-6231aa295-authorised.pdf;
and - https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-support-a-victim-of-sexual-assault-4783541;
- https://humanrights.gov.au/our-work/sex-discrimination/list-support-services;
- https://www.victimsofcrime.vic.gov.au/the-crime/types-of-crime/sexual-assault;
- https://www.healthywa.wa.gov.au/Articles/S_T/Sexual-Assault-Resource-Centre-SARC;
- https://www.health.nsw.gov.au/parvan/sexualassault/Pages/sexual-assault-resources.aspx;
- https://www.qld.gov.au/community/getting-support-health-social-issue/support-victims-abuse/sexual-abuse-assault;
and general support resources are available in Australia here, here, and here. In other nations, you will have to do an Internet search using terms such as “mental health support - <your nation>” (which, for instance, may lead to this, this, and this, in the USA, or this, this, and this, in France [biased towards English-language - my apologies]).
And the promised links on the underacknowledged and inappropriately responded to problem of women assaulting men:
- https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2023/feb/23/paul-mescal-confronts-female-fan-who-groped-him-during-selfie;
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201910/when-men-are-sexually-assaulted-women;
- https://psmag.com/news/women-sexually-assault-men-92099;
- https://clcjbooks.rutgers.edu/books/when-women-sexually-abuse-men/;
- https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2016/11/the-understudied-female-sexual-predator/503492/;
- https://thoughtcatalog.com/jim-goad/2015/11/10-ways-that-women-rape-men-and-boys/;
- https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/true-stories/men-who-were-sexually-abused-by-women-tell-their-stories/news-story/d41219325a1285a30910f84d202efcce;
- https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/15741386/teenage-women-sexual-assault-slapping-bottom/; and
- https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7167155/Woman-charged-sexually-assaulting-unconscious-man.html.
... and other links:
- https://theconversation.com/malka-leifer-found-guilty-of-sexual-abuse-of-former-students-199582;
- “male and LGBTIQA+ [domestic violence] victim survivors regularly face hurdles when seeking help” (ABC);
- “7 charts on family, domestic and sexual violence in Australia” https://theconversation.com/7-charts-on-family-domestic-and-sexual-violence-in-australia-218355
- “How Nigeria became a trailblazer against male sexual abuse | DW News Africa” https://youtu.be/QwUbQfVRyyQ?si=KF6bgteILF2YzqOx
- “‘I was severely stalked and severely abused’: Richard Gadd on the true story behind Baby Reindeer” https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2024/apr/18/i-was-severely-stalked-and-severely-abused-richard-gadd-on-the-true-story-behind-baby-reindeer Covers sexual violence against men, and women stalking men
- “When Female Predators Sexually Assault Men | Psychology Today” https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201910/when-female-predators-sexually-assault-men “When Women Sexually Assault Men - Pacific Standard” https://psmag.com/news/women-sexually-assault-men-92099 “How Often Do Women Rape Men? - The Atlantic” https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2016/11/the-understudied-female-sexual-predator/503492/ “Sexual Victimization by Women Is More Common Than Previously Known | Scientific American” https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sexual-victimization-by-women-is-more-common-than-previously-known/ but “Boy, 10, arrested after alleged sexual assault of a tourist in Cairns” https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/article/2024/may/08/boy-10-arrested-after-alleged-sexual-assault-of-a-tourist-in-cairns “‘Sexual predator’ teacher found guilty of grooming schoolboys” https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/article/2024/may/17/sexual-predator-teacher-found-guilty-of-grooming-schoolboys “Ex-NSW teacher has child sexual abuse conviction quashed because old law didn’t cover women” https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/article/2024/may/24/gaye-grant-nsw-teacher-child-sexual-abuse-law-women-ntwnfb “Gaye Grant, who is in her late 70s, was jailed for six years in late 2022 for abusing boy in 1970s” So ... a female child abuser has had her conviction overturned because, despite the REALITY that she committed sexual abuse, it wasn’t covered by the law at that time ...
- “More than 20% of Australians aged 18 to 45 have committed sexual violence in adulthood, report shows” https://www.theguardian.com/world/article/2024/jul/10/more-than-20-of-australians-aged-18-to-45-have-committed-sexual-violence-in-adulthood-report-shows “Men more likely to perpetrate sexual violence than women, and more likely to commit multiple forms of sexual violence, survey of 5,000 Australians shows” The article reports: 26.4% men perpetrated sexual violence in adulthood, 13.2% in the past 12 months; 17.7% of women perpetrated sexual violence in adulthood, 6.6% in the past 12 months. The figures are catching up in terms of showing that women can and do commit sexual violence, but the data also “overturned Australia’s “pervasive narrative” that women lie about sexual assault to ruin men’s lives. “We’ve known it’s not true … but now perpetrators have told us it’s not true.” The CEO of an organisation seeking to change men’s behaviour called for more nuanced, individualised approaches to remedying the problem of male violence. It is also time we admitted the same is necessary for women. See also (female) “Teacher arrested at Sydney school after being accused of sexual offences against a student” https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/article/2024/aug/07/sydney-teacher-arrested-sex-offences-student-ntwnfb but the gender trend (including abuse of power) still also exists: “[male] Prison guard charged with sexually assaulting [female inmate three times at NSW jail | New South Wales | The Guardian” https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/article/2024/aug/09/prison-guard-sexual-assault-charges-nsw-ntwnfb
To add a personal note to that, every single sexual assault I have been subjected to - including the child sexual abuse and the rape, before and after transition (specifically, after gender reassignment surgery) - was committed by a cisgender woman. And every single one of those women I confronted about their evil (I didn't confront all of them) came out with the same sort of stereotypical crap ("most enjoy that", "everyone else does that", etc) that men used to come out with when confronted over sexual assault - every single one.
One of the other bits of rubbish I've experienced is someone who claimed he was a sleepwalker and would have sex while sleepwalking. It was pretty obviously (from their body language and few other indicators) a blatant attempt to justify rape - there would no consent from the victim (as they portrayed it), and they seemed to be surprised when I objected and stated I would defend myself. For some genuine information on this, see here, here, here, and here - all of which say waking people while sleepwalking is NOT dangerous (another bit of the BS those two males were claiming), but should be done gently.
Although the numbers clearly show that sexual assault is overwhelmingly predominantly committed by cisgender men, cisgender women are NOT saints, they're NOT blameless, and they need to learn how to accept culpability, and be responsible enough to change themselves and stereotypes/culture/systems.
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